Too Familiar

1 Corinthians 12:12-30 ESV For just as the body is one and has many members, and all the members of the body, though many, are one body, so it is with Christ. For in one Spirit we were all baptized into one body—Jews or Greeks, slaves or free—and all were made to drink of one Spirit. For the body does not consist of one member but of many. If the foot should say, “Because I am not a hand, I do not belong to the body,” that would not make it any less a part of the body. And if the ear should say, “Because I am not an eye, I do not belong to the body,” that would not make it any less a part of the body. ... 

 It has been almost three years since our move. Three years, a time span that is, by all counts, a short amount of time, yet there are days it feels like much more.  While I know this has been the right move for our family, I would be lying if I said I did not miss our old home.  More specifically, I miss our old church.  Lately, I have found myself trying to discover why I have yet to feel connected here.

While trying to sort through some of what I have been thinking, I began discussing this topic with my husband last night.

Through everything I said, two things stood out.  First and foremost, I miss the diversity.  Our community, the city as a whole here is primarily white.  While that is not inherently a negative, I long for the differing cultures, skin colors, and styles that we were privy to in Tennessee.  I want our child to grow up appreciating others, the tones of their skin, their style of speech, and the ways they worship Christ.  I do not like that here, in this dusty little town, so many look, speak and act the same.  Yet, we are just like the vast majority, it should be comfortable and easy, but it is not.  My heart often aches for the beauty that came from being a part of  a multicultural church.  While I miss the music too, but more importantly, I miss knowing that "all are welcome here." 

While both places of worship place a high priority on missionary work, I find myself thinking our current home is prone to get lost in thinking missionaries are only needed on the other side of foreign borders.  We, the lighter skinned, must save humanity!  But what about our neighbors?  What about the facade they live behind?  What I heard before was that the mission field begins in the home, in our neighborhoods, in our communities.  If we cannot serve the least of these, who are merely hiding behind all of their material goods, how will we serve those with little?

As my friend Sara recently wrote:

There’s a gap that needs to be bridged in the world. There is a disconnect between the people who have and the people who have not. Right now, in many ways, the bridge across that gap is called the US government. The “haves” pay taxes so the “have nots” can have government programs that help them. But WHAT IF… the church was the bridge? What if we wanted to give?

What if suburbia was so moved by the gospel … so moved by grace, God’s unmerited favor on our lives … that we began to give back to Him what was already His.  (Desparate Mission Fields: Wisteria Lane)

A part of the issue is that I was serving there; I was both being fed and feeding others, and I have yet to do the same here.  I do not feel useful for the kingdom here.  In this little town, in the place that is well established, I have not broken through the lines. While the people are kind, and there are many honestly loving and gracious lives of which I am grateful to know, I am still the stranger.   

I am having trouble relating to a place that is so much like me.  The chains of similarity are smothering, the bonds of familiarity are nerve racking.  I long for diversity, for differences, for the interactions that bring about differing opinions, backgrounds and lessons. 

While discussing the problem was good, determining the solution was better.  We will walk where we believe God is leading us.  We will rejoice in being here, we will seek to find the heart of the people here.  We will watch and listen and learn how to serve, here, where we are, today. 

Our former pastor once said we would be "taking the lesson of diversity to west Texas."  I laughed as I wondered how exactly we would do that seeing as how we do not add to the diversity here.  Now I am beginning to wonder if it's the diversity of our hearts, all pointed to our heavenly Father, that we are to be sharing.  May we rejoice in the place God has us now, in the place we were and the lessons we learned.  May we seek to serve, even in suburbia.

This week's topic: Fruits & Veggies.
Is there a new fruit or veggie that you have tried recently? Or did you discover a new way to cook an old favorite?

I love fruits and veggies! Consuming the prescribed amount of fruits and vegetables is easy to accomplish for me. While many do not like them, I enjoy them and find them easy to prepare. Salads are my number one way to eat vegetables because they are easy to fix and I usually make mine with a variety of veggies.  I also like to throw some bell peppers, onions, or even some fresh spinach into my eggs in the morning.  Spinach and kale are staples in one of my favorite breakfast smoothies.

There has not ever been a time in my life that I have not liked fruit, of all kinds.  I think of fruit as nature's candy bar, but without all the calories.  Fruit provides a nice and healthy way to satisfy my sweet tooth.  When they are in season, I cannot get enough of mangos, strawberries, apples, blueberries, oranges, kiwis, melons, pineapple....the list goes on to cover the vast majority of fruits.

Now if I could convince my child to consume some vegetables.  Hmmmmm.

Consider The Cord Struck

Yesterday's post seems to have struck a chord for quite a few people.  Since its posting, I have found myself in conversations concerning this issue, and many just like it.  I made a comment to a woman today that I "sometimes think our standard get to know you questions need some revamping.  Whether then, "where do you work," "how many children do you have," and the like, what if we asked instead, "What are you enjoying about life right now?"  "What are you learning?"  "What makes you laugh?"  "How are you?"  "Is there anything I can do to help you?"  I have found myself wondering what it would look like if we each began to seek the heart of the person we are speaking to whether than their resume.

One of my favorite responses came from my dear friend Christine.  I am not surprised she stated her thoughts so well.  Here is what she said (emphasis is mine):

I'm glad you addressed this. I think it's good to apply this to other areas of parenting as well. We should respect the decisions that others make and not question it or think its wrong just because it's not the path we have chosen (or God has given us). Anything from : where they go to school; public, private, home school, what we feed them, how we dress them, how we handle discipline, how much moms work or don't work, and of course how many children we raise. It makes people feel safe to assume that since you aren't doing what I'm doing you must have made a wrong choice because the alternative (I made the wrong choice) is too difficult. When in reality none of that matters. We all make different choices and that's ok.  It's in God's hands.

She also listed well known only children, which was rather fascinating.  

I am challenging myself, and you, to begin walking alongside those you enounter without questioning every step that is made.  As you do, refrain from asking why they are walking as they are, and be content with the simple fact that we are not alone in this world.

 

Let's Talk About One Child Homes (AKA: My Rant)

My dear friend Carla, who happens to be an extraordinary mom, pastor's wife, and talented writer, recently wrote a great post entitled, "Five Things Not To Say To Adoptive Parents."  I found myself nodding in agreement, not because we have adopted, but because we have family and friends who have.  While I read through her post, I also began considering our own family and the questions we receive.  It is not that we are so unique, it is simply that we have one child.

The questions we get asked are typically as follows:

• "Don't you think your daughter needs a sibling?" 
• "When are you going to get a brother or sister for her?"
• "Aren't you worried she will grow up to be spoiled?"
• "Why don't you have other children?  Don't you want more?"
• "Don't you think she will be lonely being an only child?"

The list goes on, and on, and on some more.  I have a few statements I would like to say, but I don't.  I bite my tongue and nod and smile, and do my best to remove myself from the conversation.  If my child is with me, I am usually fighting back anger because I do not want her to interpret these questions as meaning she is less than a child with siblings.

Rather than diving into personal details like, "Well, we have tried, but what do you know?  No baby.  Not sure why, but it just hasn't happened," I typically say, "That is all up to God.  If He wants her to be an only child, that is what she will be, if He wants her to have siblings, she will have them."  I have, in past conversations, stated that it did not matter to me one way or another because I really did not want to go through pregnancy and a c-section again and that having to recover from that as I near 40 just did not sound fun.  A comment like that?  It is easier to say than explaining how maybe there is something physically wrong with one of us and having to endure the pity of the other person.

I am left wondering why we believe someone could not be happy in the situation they are in.  What is wrong with having one child?  There are as many talented, caring, giving, selfless only children as there are those from multiple sibling homes.  In fact, I know plenty of children, who have siblings, who are spoiled, obnoxious and undisciplined.  In spite of that, I do not walk up to the parents and state, "Maybe you should not have had more than one child because you clearly can't handle it."

I have been pondering why we, especially women, do not encourage one another more than we question one another.  I have friends with no children, friends with one, friends with six or more.  I have friends who have birthed their children naturally, others who have had c-sections, and some who have adopted.  I find each to be wonderful and beautiful, and walking the script God has for them. 

As my husband and I have discussed this topic, we have come to a place that has us thankful for where we are.  We are so grateful to be the parents of an intelligent, comical, lively, curly haired girl who delights in conversations with anyone and is more often than not smiling and laughing.  We do not feel robbed of anything and find it our responsibility to do our best to help her become the woman God wants her to be.  We want her to walk the journey God has for her, not the one society would write for her.  We want her to praise God for every single person and circumstance in her life, and even for those not in her life.  We want her to trust that God is indeed working all things together for her good, and we teach that best by modeling that on a daily basis.

Yes, I had always believed we would have more than one child.  Maybe we will at some point, I do not know.  What I do know is that I find incredible joy right where we are, in this time, in this place, with our only child.

Why Supplements?

For safe, effective supplements, go here. 

A Few Of My Favorite Things

Do not let the silence of this blog fool you. The lack of posting is not due to a lack of activity in my little world. There is quite a bit going on, which I will sum up in one word "preparation." We are in a season of being prepared which means there is also a great deal of growth**, and it is exciting. Vague? A bit, but for now, that is  all you get.

Yet, I do miss blogging and I miss interacting with other bloggers.  So for today, I give you, a few of my favorite things:

• I stumbled upon this blog the other day, written by former Biggest Loser contestant Austin Andrews.  Good stuff, check him out.
• Have you visited the Tip Junkie site?  Seriously, this gal has some incredible DIY ideas!  I made some of the body scrubs she has posted for my daughter's preschool teacher, and they were a hit.  Now, I should make some for myself.
• The women's shirts and tanks on this site had me doubled over laughing and smiling.  Genius.
• Fat Sick and Nearly Dead.  I was inspired, bought a juicer and have made one of his recipes.  I need to sit down and plan some more out.  It is rather fun my friends.
• CrossFit.  Do you dare?
• AdvoCare's Catalyst. It protects my muscles and helps them tone up.  
• Have you heard the song Alive by Natalie Grant?  You should, it will bless your socks right off.

**No, I am not hinting I am pregnant.  A friend at church asked me based on this post, so I want to clear that right up.  I do not keep those kinds of things to myself, I would be blabbing that news the second we found out!  The growth taking place is that of mental, emotional, and spiritual growth.  

 

WLW: Homemade Lara Bars

Topic: you are free to choose!

All of a sudden I am in a panic because there is no set topic. Hmmm, what to discuss?  I've got it!  I am going to take the easy way out and share a recipe, which is good.  Trust me, I made it just one hour ago, so I know this to be true.

Have you ever found yourself wanting to buy protein bars but opted out due to the price?  Well friends, let me tell you, I happened upon this site, and found a recipe for homemade Lara bars.  Can I get a "woo hoo" anyone?  I made the oatmeal raisin variety, and they were tasty!  Plus, a whole lot cheaper than any packaged bar I might buy.  Click here to see all the varieties, but for now, here's the oatmeal raisin bars.

Ingredients:

• 1 c. (160g) raisins
• 1/4 c. warm water
• 3/4 c. (60g) oatmeal (not quick-cook)
• 3/4 c. (90g) cashews
• 1/2 tsp. cinnamon
• 1/4 tsp. vanilla
• dash salt 

Directions:
Soak the dried fruit in warm water for 5-10 minutes.  Meanwhile, gather remaining ingredients and pour into a food processor.  Drain the fruit and add to the food processor.  Process for 30 – 60 seconds or until the mixture sticks together when pinched with your fingers.  Pour into a loaf pan and press firmly into bars with a spatula.  Chill for 10 minutes and then cut into 6 bars.  Store refrigerated for up to two weeks.

Enjoy.

No Exceptions